Crossing your threshold


Remember last week when I shared this? If you help a butterfly emerge from its chrysalis, it will most certainly die. The emerging is a struggle for the butterfly but imperative to its survival. The struggle is actually the final stage of the butterfly pumping hormones into its wings, strengthening them so it can fly. No struggle, no flight. This is what is means to cross a threshold, metaphorically speaking.

Crossing a threshold is when you break free of your chrysalis. May I remind you that you can only be free to move forward if you change what keeps you from flying. A caterpillar doesn't merely sprout wings: it becomes a butterfly.

Crossing a threshold isn't about resting into the mystery. It's about being IN the mystery fully. It's an active pause. A caterpillar can't observe its transformation objectively. It has to go within. It surrenders to its fate. Between the old and the new, there is a gap. Rest in this awhile. The gap might look painful because it's chock full of unknowns -- this is the field of pure potentiality. Literally anything is possible in this gap. You will be confronted with the greatness of your unknowing, because not-knowing is infinitely vast. So vast you can't even imagine it.

This gap can make you feel stir-crazy and restless. You want to move through as quickly as possible because as much as we love spontaneity, we love certainty more. Remember, the devil you know is worse than the devil you don't know.

You will want to escape back to the comfort you once knew but once you cross, once you pause and lean INTO the mystery of pure potential there is no "going back." You can't un-know possibility. It's like seeing the Grand Canyon and then being asked to unsee it.

When you lean into this or leap into this threshold you're being asked to surrender to something much bigger than you and much more meaningful TO you. You are being asked to cultivate an interior space for inquiry. To ask bold questions but not reach for obvious, knowable answers. It requires that you let your ego and conscious mind get in the passenger seat of your journey and be observers.

I will share the steps I shared on the call that followed Jessica's. (Again, I recommend listening!)

1.) The "Oh Shit" Moment
2.) At a Crossroads
3.) Try it on
4.) Get Feedback

When you cross a threshold and enter fully into a transitional point in your life, this is the order things will unfold.

The "Oh Shit" Moment
You are being asked to make a shift, and now. It will feel like this sudden change is coming from outside of you. Your job is not secure, your partner wants a divorce, you lost a parent, you decide you have to start a business, etc. They feel like "outside" events you are reacting to. This level of being blindsided will present as an "oh shit" moment.

We've all had these moments, many of them. When in this phase the best thing you can do is pause. Don't react, just pause. Nothing is happening TO you so much as it's happening FOR you. Really get this. You are being given a gift. And if you look within, I am sure you'll find that you knew it was coming. Part of the "oh shit" moment is reconciling with the part of you that knew this was around the corner.

At a Crossroads
You don't get to a new choice without taking total responsibility for the above. You don't get to create new possibilities when you stay in the "why did this happen to me?" mode. This is when being a victim either turns into surviving or self-victimization. The crossroads look like possible pathways to take. You have options. This is the mystery and pure possibility point. This is when you get to ask your soul, "What's possible?" and then shut up and LISTEN. Soak it all in. Even when it makes NO sense.

Try it on
Choose a path. Walk it for a bit. Yes, you can always go back and choose the other path. But if you're being really honest with yourself, chances are you know exactly the right path for yourself from the beginning.

Get Feedback
The path you choose becomes your new life. A new job, a new home, a new partner, a new singe life, etc. This is all feedback. Do you like where you've ended up? Is this what you had in mind? Is it not what you had in mind? Either you enter bliss and reside in your newness or you find yourself back at an "oh shit" moment. It's a cycle.

"Wanderer, there is no way, the road is made by walking."
-Antonio Machado

We don't observe our life and then choose it objectively. We CREATE our life by walking through it. You are entirely built of subjective experience. Your life is the only one that can be lived by you. Your path can only be walked by you.

You will come up to and be asked to cross a threshold. Not by anyone but your inner self. You don't have to cross. It is always a choice. But make no mistake about this -- not crossing IS your choice. And the pain caused by not crossing is far worse than anything you can ever experience when you enter into a self-organized creative relationship with your soul. What else do you think you're here to do? ;)