30 Days of Unreasonable Requests
I wanted to wait and share this practice when I had more data. However, in the short time I've adopted this practice the results are SO awesome, I couldn't hold out any longer.
First, let me define what an Unreasonable Request is:
Unreasonable Request: a request that the person you're asking has no reason to say yes to.
I started this practice because at the start of March I found myself disenchanted with whole chunks of my business. The impulse was to blame "outside" forces. You know the nagging dialogue because I know you've done this too.
"Why aren't the 'right' clients showing up?"
"Why aren't people paying me what I'm worth?"
"How do I reach the 'right' market because this will solve everything?"
"When will people see my value?!"
Anytime I find these thoughts coursing through my mind I know I am at a dead end. I need to back it up and get back to my thoughts and how I created this scenario.
I was reading The Inside Out Revolution at the time (coincidence?) and in that book, there is a teeny tiny little paragraph about something called "unreasonable requests."
I'd read this book before and did not remember this. For all the right reasons, this time this background idea became foreground.
I started by thinking about all the places in my business and life where I wasn't asking people what I most wanted to ask because I ASSUMED I would receive a polite no.
And since my way wasn't exactly getting me where I wanted to go, I figured it was time to try something different.
I started with the goal of 30 Unreasonable Requests in 30 days.
Then they were happening 2–3 at a time so I decided to write them down.
Then the magic happened.
Everyone I was making a BIG, BOLD ASK of was saying...yes.
What the heck! This meant that all this time I was holding myself back — no one else was, just me and that tricky narrative in my mind.
Here are some examples of things I NEVER thought would get a yes:
I asked an ongoing client to uplevel to a bigger program
I asked a returning client to add on coaching and pay more than she normally pays
I asked my mentor for his home address to mail a card
I invited someone to a month of coaching to try something new
I asked a client I deeply admire to meet me for a fancy lunch date to discuss other opportunities
I asked someone to decide on enrolling in a program within 24 hours
I asked to share and teach this topic at The Superwoman Summit in October
I sent handmade invites in the mail to people all over the world to an upcoming event
The list kept growing. Tomorrow will be 30 days. In total, I received 27 yeses and 3 no's. Those yeses added up to new clients, money, opportunities, re-connection, referrals, and most importantly...I am not afraid to ask anymore.
Where in your own life do you hold back or fear you don't even have the right to ask? I believe the quality of your life is determined by the quality of your questions. But what if you aren't even asking the question for fear of rejection?
Here is what I am finding out: rejection is a myth. You can't be rejected for something you never had to begin with. If you ask for something you don't have and you don't get it, you are in no different of a place than before the ask!
And as I discovered (and my community members are also discovering) more than 90% of the time, you will get a yes.
Which brings me to the challenge we are running inside our Free Community and which YOU are invited to join!
The Unreasonable Requests Challenge:
30 Days, 30 Unreasonable Requests
1. If you aren't already a member, join here.
2. I have created a POST IN THE FEATURES BAR titled "April Challenge"
3. Go there and leave a comment: "I'm in!"
4. Every day in April comment in the challenge thread a) what request did you make today and b) what was the outcome? (We're just a week in and our members have made more than 150 requests, most of which have been yeses!)
5. Your goal is to make 30 Unreasonable Requests in 30 Days.
The question is no longer "what if I am rejected?" The question is now: who will I become when I can ask for anything?