This article won’t go out for a couple weeks, but I am currently writing it from a bumpy bus seat as I commute back and forth for my family. Although this is a pretty tenuous time in my family’s lives I do my best to keep some things private. It’s important for the sake of my family’s privacy but also because the details are only important to those involved.
The lessons, however, are the very basis on which I practice my work and model possibility for those who choose to lean into me once in awhile.
It’s amazing how much perspective is available when the unplanned and unwanted things in life come our way - how trivial problems evaporate, how gratitude and grace land right at your feet, and how much space for BS shrinks. Well, I would say I am in the thick of it all.
There’s nowhere to be but right where you are. Even when you wish to be somewhere else. This reminder is the sweetest offering anyone could ever give you.
As a business owner I tread that line between appreciating what I’ve built, keeping it moving, and planning for what’s to come and sometimes I wonder if that planning for what’s to come gets in the way of what is actually here?
I wanted to post something on Instagram in the midst of it all but didn’t because I felt like no one actually wants to see or hear the truth, they merely want to doll it up and parade it around as self-propaganda. I am no exception. I do this too. We all do this. But for what purpose?
What good is promoting a beautiful life if you can’t feel your feet on the ground when life goes amiss - and I assure you it will go very amiss.
What good is doing the work if when it counts most, you can’t access a space inside yourself that actually feels like home and like it can all be OK?
I realize these questions are a bit rhetorical, but they're necessary. Every life experience is a doorway to something, but it doesn’t mean you always want to walk through it, and this is OK.
Sometimes we walk through with one hand covering our eyes. Sometimes we walk through glacially to get a grip on whatever is happening on the other side. And sometimes we downright refuse and slam the door shut - forgetting that we carry the door inside ourselves.
We carry the door inside ourselves.
What does it mean to practice faith when it matters the most? In my line of work we talk about faith with an air of obviousness, like you just grab hold of it when you need a little. But faith isn’t a luxury or even a lifeline. When it really matters it’s more of a plea.
I believe it goes hand in hand with surrendering to the moment, and that can be the scariest experience of all. It’s admitting you don’t know what’s to come and you can’t control what’s to come, but maybe in the midst of it all you can conjure up just a tad bit of hope that it will be just as it needs to be. No matter how painful or inconvenient that is.
As I sit with my family right now I am struck by how little I can actually do. How little we can ever really do, when we want to the most. And how OK that is. It isn’t a blind acceptance of what’s unfolding and it isn’t a passive surrender to the chaos. But the sooner I surrender to the fact that life will continue to unfold the way it always has, the sooner I can be with what IS instead of what I wish could be.
This is all I ever want for my fellow human peeps. To be. I know that sounds so simple and maybe naively so it is. But so much of what we struggle with is anticipated or already gone.
We have this gift with every moment. The people who are right here, now. The opportunity that is right here, right now. And the dream that is in your mind, right now. Stay with that awhile even if it means slowing down or even stillness - because in the stillness there is so much truth.
More truth than most of us can sometimes bear, so I understand wanting to rush through it all, numb out, take radical action, or move quickly. But what is possible if you didn’t? What is possible if you let the slow present be exactly what it is?
Personally, I can breathe more deeply and appreciate more fiercely. I can see what’s actually there, and instead of rushing to sugar coat it or glam it up for social media, I see what really matters like never before. And in THAT moment all there really is, is grace.
A ton of beautiful, compassionate, patient, grace.
This article won’t go out for a couple weeks, but I am currently writing it from a bumpy bus seat as I commute back and forth for my family. Although this is a pretty tenuous time in my family’s lives I do my best to keep some things private. It’s important for the sake of my family’s privacy but also because the details are only important to those involved.
Recently, my biz coach asked me what my fellow change agents had in common. It took only seconds before I started listing the things I see in my clients and students as well as the things I've experienced firsthand. The fear, doubt, excitement, ease, and then more fear...
In my experience, we all go through some variation of the following:
- Disbelief that what we think is possible will actually happen
- Hope that can sometimes feel naive or like we're missing something
- An overwhelming sense of "imposter syndrome"
- If we fully go after our dream or vision we'll lose something meaningful in the process
- No one will ever pay us to do what we love
- If we reveal our fear people will walk away or not hire us
- Everyone has it more "figured out" than me
- Questions like: Am I making this too hard? Am I missing something? Has this been done before? Who is going to come along for this ride? And my personal favorite, what the f*$k am I doing?
I say favorite because it rings in my head almost every day - "What the f*$k am I doing?" What if my vision doesn't work? What if my belief that I have so much faith and conviction for steers me wayyyy off course? What if I'm actually not the one for this job? What if the other shoe drops and it all just dries up?
This is the part where I am supposed to switch gears and tell you that of course, it will work out! But I can't. Because your dream working out is not up to me. It's up to you.
Only you can decide if what you're aimed at, fighting for, and believe in is worth all of the above. And the sooner you decide this, the sooner you can roll your sleeves up and get to work.
Somewhere in the spring, I turned my back on my purpose. OK, that sounds a bit dramatic, but looking back it's how I feel about it. I feel like I got ahead of myself and tried to steer the ship. But what happened was the ocean dried up. Metaphorically speaking :)
I took space because I needed it and truthfully because I wanted it. But I didn't account for the world going on without me. And it will. The world will keep turning and evolving because that's what it does. If you aren't heeding your call, someone else will. It isn't because you don't deserve it or because you aren't "the one"; it's because we are our calling's stewards. And if you stop listening it moves on to the next steward.
Your calling has insight, creativity and a soul all its own. Sometimes I think my calling is simply using me because it is! Well, I took space and also turned off my call button. I stopped being the work.
And what happened next honestly surprised me: I got bored. Like, really bored.
I could feel myself on the outside looking in and it didn't feel so good. My momentum stopped because I stopped stoking the fire. I stopped showing up in the way I know I can. But in the moment it just felt like a funk, and I thought maybe I was just reacting to something. It never occurred to me that the universe really is following my lead...
It's following yours, too.
When I was finally ready to admit that I was done sitting on the sidelines I ate whole humble pies, washed them down, and called my coaches. Yes, plural.
One reminded me that we all need a pause even in the midst of the big game of our life to get reconnected to our mission and restore the energy to make it happen. The second reminded me that I was too good to sit on the sidelines but that I also can't confuse conviction with importance. Thanks, coaches.
And then I cried. A lot. And kept crying for weeks. And it felt so freakin' good. I cried about losing my purpose, about getting too full of myself, about being bored, I even cried about thinking I had it all figured out. What I did was release. Release. Release. And I remembered this potent truth that gets me out of bed every single morning:
I believe in people. I wholeheartedly believe in their ability to do good, love, and heal. I have a deep belief in the spiritual potential of humanity and I won't quit until every single human being inherently understands their true value and worth.
Something tells me you feel the same way. In your own words, what gets you out of bed in the morning? What keeps you going when you have the question of, "What the f*$k am I doing?" buzzing around in your head?
If you need to pull over once in awhile and take a little rest, do. Maybe everything won't stop like it did for me, or maybe you'll reconnect to the deeper truth of why you risk yourself spiritually to fight for your vision. It isn't even about the world needing you. It's about YOU needing you and it's about YOU coming fully alive. I believe that for everyone this is the real mission. The rest are merely details.
But when you do connect with your vision, stoke your conviction, worship your belief in what's possible, and keep going...well I guess we'll find out, won't we?
I like the number 33. A double number just feels like good luck. I've compiled a year's worth of life lessons in honor of my 33rd birthday. You can read last year's lessons here. I am struck by something I wrote last year, something I don't remember writing and am so glad I did...
"I wish for all people to have their entire life be their entire awakening. To get out of their own way and go for it. To answer their calling and turn their art into their purpose and to give their gift back to the world. Maybe this is a selfish want. But it's my birthday and this is what I want."
Well, I still want this ;) But something I learned this year is to not attach to whether this actually happens. And with that, onto my lessons...
I learned that I can want so much for others, perhaps too much, but I have zero say over what actually happens out there in the world and we'd all be fools to think we do beyond our own being.
I learned that success cannot be measured by our riches alone. That in business it can be so easy to assume success is best measured by your bank account, but what about the richness in a community, in how well you serve others, and in how well you treat yourself?
I learned that expansion is inevitable and that I will never arrive. As Abraham says, "You can not get it wrong and you can not get it done." Every new thought is a new creation, which creates more contrast, which creates a new thought, and on it goes.
I learned that sometimes good people make poor choices. And it's important to keep their humanity in mind because even a seemingly poor choice has a reason. Even if you don't know what it is or can't understand it, I assure you that it exists.
I learned that we can not get it wrong and we will never get it done. Every new idea brings new expansion, new expansion creates more contrast and even chaos, which creates more ideas...and so the cycle goes.
I learned that no one has it figured out. <--- period
I learned that I want to live at the beach. It may not happen soon but it is happening and someday I will spend the majority of my days overlooking the Pacific Ocean.
I learned that everyone's path is sacred. That comparison is a one-way ticket to pain and that we have to love others' paths as fiercely as we love our own.
I re-learned that human beings are magical, weird, silly, full of it, powerful, prideful, scared and full of potential. You don't always know what you'll see when you look at humanity, which is why I also learned that the very best place to start and end is with yourself.
I learned that my home matters. What I wear is important to me. And that I love rosé.
I re-learned that it's important to spend time with the people who matter. It really isn't what you know but who, and the "who" I'm referring to are those that are near and dear to me. The people whom I love very much, who have seen me wayyyyyy up and wayyyyy down and their affection for me never wavered. To these people, THANK YOU. I couldn't do what I do without you.
I need to repeat this: it isn't actually up to us how things turn out, and our obsession with what we have, what we don't have, what we're missing, and what we're striving for is a big old distraction. You already are everything you could possibly be at this very moment and so to be awesomer...you simply be.
My clients are visionaries; they have these mega ideas not about how the world does work but about how it could work. To the outside world, they look like dreamers who live in fantasyland - people who are attempting the impossible with no real account for what “real life” requires. You know, work-hard kind of stuff.
To the outside world, my dreamers are banking on some concoction of faith, belief, and blind luck. But here’s what the outsiders don’t know about what my dreamers know. These visionaries know that they’re playing a game. That we all are. And the game is not meant for you to succeed or fail. It’s simply meant to be played.
So they are playing.
They are using their inner guidance and gut to follow their path of least resistance. To serve, seek, and find their joy in their dreams. And the successful dreamers know that we all have two options in life, and that one will yield significantly better results than the other. Can you guess which one?
Option A) They can use higher guidance to fulfill their goals.
Option B) They can allow themselves to be guided to fulfill their role in the unfolding of their life.
Dreamers succeed because they are following an inner dream, not an outer dream. They are on their path of least resistance and they know that there is no failure, because success is inevitable. This is what we call a calling.
It's an inner call that beckons you toward some great unknown that you can’t see but you can feel. And you can feel when you’re on the path toward your calling and when you’re on a path that’s taking you away from your calling. My purpose seekers understand this quote...
“No matter how hard a surfer works, the ocean is doing most of the heavy lifting. Because, the operant power behind any force of nature, is nature itself.”
– Inside Out Revolution
I want to introduce you to a client. Her name is Jessica and she is a force to be reckoned with. The fist time I met Jessica, we met for an innocent happy hour. I knew right away that this was a woman with a purpose and a powerful path to fulfill. But the woman who sat across from me didn’t quite get this. She was playing small.
Now, I don’t mean she was doubtful of herself or that she wasn’t amassing a big following. I mean that she wasn’t living to the fullest extent of her path or allowing it to unfold from within.
The day she hired me I looked at her and said, “You are meant for big things. And I believe in a bigger vision for you, and I think you can feel that.” She looked at me and said, “I’ve felt this but no one has ever seen it in me also.”
Jessica is the founder of the Superwoman Project and has launched the first annual Superwoman Summit. All of this unfolded from within when she surrendered to her intuition and trusted that her vision wasn’t some crazy idyllic ideology or pipedream, but something she felt deeply called to fulfill. It had been there all along.
She chose Option B.
Before, when she was trying to make her work happen and "effort" her way there, she was attempting to convince herself that this calling was, in fact, tapping her directly on the shoulder. She tried with all her might to do anything but this expression of her work. Because it felt BIG, but in truth, it was also the path of least resistance.
In other words, she let the waves work their magic. And all she had to do was put her surfboard in the water and surf. All she had to do was let her intuition in the driver's seat and play.
It doesn't make sense to fight so hard, work so hard, or push so hard for what you already have. Quiet the mind for a moment and listen. Park your doubts for what you hear. Suspend your judgments of yourself for thinking you're incapable of this feat. Don't try to be the ocean and the surfboard. It isn't your job.
Your job is to fulfill your dreams, not from "out here" but in here. Your crazy, visionary, idyllic dream. Because - and this I can guarantee - if you can feel it, then the world needs it.
Over the weekend I got to visit my coach who has four legs. His name is Kett and he’s a horse. The sun was out, a near impossible feat for a Portland spring day, so we worked in the outdoor ring. The ring was lined with grass and it seemed all Kett wanted to do was eat.
My intention for this particular session was to tap into a gnawing I can’t escape and for once, I don’t want to. This gnawing that my work is about to pivot, again, but this time toward a more central truth I’ve been blatantly ignoring for more than four years.
That I (gulp) work with entrepreneurs.
Now for some of you, this is obvious and right now you are confused why I seem to be the only one who wasn't aware of this. But, alas, I wasn’t.
Yes, I am aware that I have an entire weekend immersion twice per year dedicated to this group.
Yes, I am aware that I have launched a year-long training to teach transformation to this group. And still, I’ve been doing the avoidance dance since I opened my private practice in 2010.
My primary reason for this is not that interesting and reveals something deeper about my personality – because everyone seems to work with entrepreneurs, I wanted nothing to do with it...
So here I am, working with my four-legged coach who just wants to eat grass and I can’t grab his attention. I am in the middle of this round pen and I say to my coach, “This is kind of perfect. He’s on the perimeter and I don’t know how to get his attention. Much like these visionary entrepreneur's, I am finally ready to acknowledge I love working with. They are distracted...”
The perimeter represents all the things we do to not do our real work. We measure things, we base our results on income, we stretch ourselves by trying to be everywhere but in our own hearts and minds. In short, we hang out on the perimeter and eat grass. Because it’s good at the moment and because we’ve been told it’s how to succeed in our work.
But what if there were an alternative?
Back to this book, The Three Waves of Volunteers and the New Earth. This book is about three waves of lightworkers sent here by the source to help our work heal from within. Sounds like sci-fi, right? It’s non-fiction.
The first wave included figures like Mahatma Gandhi and Martin Luther King, Jr. They were focused on sending light into oppression and cultivating non-violence.
The second wave included the dawn of the metaphysical world, figures like Dr. Wayne Dyer, Marianne Williamson, and Deepak Chopra. They were focused on making the soul visible and have paved the way for the third wave.
Now, this is where things get interesting. The third wave was a tipping point of lightworkers. They are no longer contained to movements of non-violence and the woo-woo conferences. Now they are on Twitter and in your local bookshop writing and speaking about healing and the great awakening as though it were as easy to play a role in as using the #optout.
It's a trend that is trendy because it’s a paradigm shifter.
The third wave isn't comprised of your grandmother’s healers holing up in the vortexes of Sedona. Nope. They are also (gulp) entrepreneurs.
The third wave of healers that will shift how we think, work, love, act, and activate are the very people trending on Instagram and are using conscious commerce to spread something more than consumerism – they are spreading harmony.
Not all entrepreneurs. But for those of you who want to activate more harmony, peace, possibility, fulfillment, and purpose in your fellow human beings through your work then I have a request for you.
Get off the perimeter and stop eating grass.
Come play in the center of the ring where you can look up and see the sky. Where you can play and move and act with ease and magic. But a shift like this requires that you see the possibility of activating a kind of depth in your work you’ve only glimpsed in states of flow.
What if this were the norm? What if your day was a constant state of flow interrupted mildly by email and social media? What if instead of playing with the numbers, conversions, and results you played with the source of your soulful success? (YOU.)
What if your day were only about:
Intuiting your path
Playing with possibility
Deep stretches of time for thinking, reflecting, and attracting
Aligning and being energetically congruent
Focus on the few things that literally matter
To pursue and seek purpose and fulfillment
Being in nature.
And yes, getting off the perimeter.
When I got clear about this I decided that no matter what Kett wanted to do, I wanted to play and dance in the area. So I did. And then, this is the magical part: Kett followed and wanted to play, too.
So, do you want to play?
This photo was taken after a pretty epic but impromptu dance party at Awaken Your Practice just a couple weeks ago. My coach and fellow Awaken teacher decided to play a little game with us which evolved into a ridiculous dance fest which turned into epic laughter and of course, joy.
After we all cooled off and got the giggles out, he sat us down for a teaching on Divine Play and reminded us that business (and I would add LIFE) doesn't need to be so serious. And he's right. Instead, he invited us to write our own rules. This was just one of many incredible moments during the weekend.
This immersion continues to surprise me and blow me away. I will share some testimonials shortly but for now, I am soaking it all up. Because Awaken Your Practice was just me writing my own rules and inviting people along for the ride.
I shared at the Awaken weekend how I had been getting a massage, just lying there on the table getting some yummy self-care when the idea literally appeared in my mind. Out of nowhere. Or I should say, "nowhere." I could feel it brewing for awhile and on that particular day, I was ready to hear it.
I remember spending the next morning pouring ideas into my journal about bringing coaches and entrepreneurs together and doing something radically different - not teaching tools but teaching truth. Not giving them more information but more intuition. It seemed like the most obvious thing to do and yet it would require that I wrote my own rules.
I have the right to write a book.
I have the right to teach others.
I am worth sharing my ideas with the world.
I have my own permission to teach about energy, intention, vision, and the purpose of business in this new economy.
I can bring the right people together at the right time.
I can be valuable to my own special brand of magic.
And so on they went. Before I knew it I was talking about this immersion with no "sales page" and nothing to show for it but some conviction that wouldn't seem to leave me alone.
Then I was enrolling people for the first immersion last fall before the book was fully formed. I rented a space. I invited teachers to join me. And bam...6 months after that massage I found myself in my first Awaken Your Practice weekend.
Two weeks ago was the second time I taught this and it blew me away. This thing that I had intuited was fully formed and ready to go, it just needed me to write the rules for myself so I could show up and play full out on its behalf. And next month I begin enrolling for the third one. THIRD.
What rules do you need to write for yourself so that you can bring your ideas to life? Even more important - what rules are you currently following that are keeping you from bringing your ideas to life? No matter if I am coaching a visionary entrepreneur, a c-suite leader, or a mixed group of people I see the following 5 rules show up the most...
- The world defines my value for me.
- I am too small to make a big difference.
- I am waiting to be given permission.
- It has to be hard to be worth it.
- Others' needs come first.
No matter your title, you are human, first. And as a human, you are subject to your beliefs. Your beliefs are those bold absolute statements you have created to make sense of your life and the world. We are meaning-making machines -- this means we need to make sense of things. All things. I think this quote sums it up beautifully:
"BELIEFS ARE AN ASSUMPTION ABOUT THE NATURE OF REALITY."
One year ago I stopped looking outside of myself for answers and I stopped listening to "marketing experts," "Facebook gurus," and "high-end coaches" and got very still. I listened to my heart by opening up a dialogue through my journal. Call it a portal, call it a channel, call it woo-woo, I don't care.
It didn't bring life to my business -- it brought my business TO life. I wrote my own rules for success. And I did so unapologetically.
I invite you to write new rules and erase some old ones. Beliefs are subjective and they're yours. So you may as well make them your bitch. Or something like that :)
Believe it or not, not everyone hears their calling. Some hear it in faint whispers, some in assertive nudges, some have no idea what a calling is, some have been hearing it their whole life and never engaged with it...and then there are the rare ones. The ones who hear it, turn toward it and let it crack them open. They are the "crazy" ones.
If you look up the word crazy, you'll see: 1) Mentally deranged in a wild way or 2) Extremely enthusiastic. This sounds about right. To hear your calling, answer it, and let it guide you may appear nuts from the outside.
A calling is often irrational, and will pull you in the exact opposite direction you are living your life. It will ask you to question what you think is real and it will most certainly beckon you to defend it when things go awry, which they will. Because your calling is, after all, already part of you.
And once you pay it any attention, watch out. That calling will only get louder, more obnoxious, more irritating, and show up everywhere. What is it exactly? I don't know. Not in any tangible sense. I can't point to it or bottle it up. You can't order yours online from Amazon.com and you can't have it overnighted when you're ready to deal with it. So why is it so imperative that you answer this thing I can't point to?
Why else do you think you're here? You're not just taking up space, you know. Your calling won't be easy or pain-free. It will ask you to uncover anything and everything you've spent your life burying deep down or numbing out. Your calling can feel like a shock or a wake-up call. Either way, it isn't exactly subtle.
So much of what passes for spirituality today is about positivity, happiness, and affirmation for more positivity or happiness which ignores an entire half of life. It is in the contrast of pain that we learn compassion. Sometimes we need to be uncomfortable; to come up against our discomfort is to enter a new landscape with so much access to our deeper truth and deeper contribution. Your calling is the path to this.
I know, with this lovely description is it any wonder you aren't running out to actualize your calling this very moment? But here's the thing - what alternative do you have? What's a life without meaning? Without feeling like you really matter? What happens to those who ignore their calling, deny their calling, or pretend it isn't real? Again, I don't know.
Before I answered my calling, there was life with motion but it didn't move me. My calling has moved me to engage with life like an artist who is painting and being painted at the same time. Above all else, I feel liberated. Liberated to create and be created, the most sacred act.
Your calling is your reminder why you're here. Why did you choose this life? Why did you choose this family or this home? Why did you choose these circumstances or these moments of pain?
A calling isn't some place you arrive; it's the pathway to take you back to yourself, your whole self. So no, it can't leave you alone once acknowledged because once made aware, your calling is like receiving your orders from the universe. Until then, we're really just buying time.
Believe it or not, ignoring your calling is more painful than letting it in. And once in, it's best to let go. It's like letting a dam crack open. The sheer force will run its course -- let it. Whatever it takes down was not very strong to begin with. And as that water churns and washes over the landscape of your life you'll wake up. You'll fully wake up and there will come a day and you'll say, "Oh. I get it now." And you'll get back to creating your life. Your simple, meaningful, call-filled life.
This is a photo from my Instagram. I posted it on January 20th. I was being cheeky and not at the same time. There is a disturbance in the force. Even if you've never seen a single Star Wars movie, I have a feeling you know this quote...and it seems pretty applicable given our current climate.
A disturbance in the force means there's an imbalance; things are out of harmony. You don't have to look far to see this. Just look at our declining rainforests and the current endangered animals list. For being such conscious beings, we don't respect others very much -- whether this "other" is a tree or a human. WTF?
And then we ask such blatant questions like -- how are we going to solve this? What are we really in danger of losing? How will we fix our current state of poverty, homelessness, racism, hunger, etc? And what is it we're really aiming to solve? Do we even know?
Sometimes the "it" is so big we lump it into one word. For example, hunger. Like this word can possibly contain all the complications and needs of the people who fundamentally don't have enough to eat on a daily basis.
I'll never forget (and stop me if you've heard this story) one of my infamous discussions with my dad about life.
He asked me, "How come, if we can feed everyone, we don't?"
I replied, "Because we don't have a resource problem. We have a heart problem."
And therein lies our dilemma. How do we, especially those of us who live in the United States, open our hearts when our culture has taught us to independently rise? What is one to do when we're encouraged to be true to ourselves and climb the ladder -- even if it means stepping over someone on the way up?
Then, when you get to the top, you are genuinely confused why there aren't more of you up there. Do people just not want it bad enough? Are people not motivated? Are they just not as much of a go-getter as I am?
On January 20th, 2017 we swore in the 45th president of the United States of America. He is a president that has no doubt stirred the pot. He isn't the disturbance in the force. He's a byproduct of it.
On January 21st, 2017 more than 5 million people from 55 global cities and every state in the union gathered for one of the most peaceful demonstrations to date as an answer to this president. Or at least in hopes of starting a new conversation.
I keep thinking that this is a movie. That I can turn it off, sigh some relief and go to bed knowing it wasn't real. But it is real. And it certainly falls in line with this global ascension we just entered the ring with.
All the right characters are here:
The Hero: You (the protagonist)
The Villain: The anti-you or everything that invokes anger in you (the antagonist)
The Theme: Can we create harmony?
The Climax: What will ultimately be tested on our way back to the middle?
The Payoff: (We don't know yet...)
But I can't turn this off! It's here. So what now? We have a major antagonist. Which means we also have a protagonist. Hesitant but present.
Here's the thing. When I ask you toward the end of this article to step into the light, know that you can't do so by eradicating the dark. It's still dark. It just has light shining on it. Where there's a shadow we have light, and where we have light we have a shadow.
We need to redefine what it means to solve "this." Harmony is not all light and it is not all dark. It is both/and.
Since the election, I've found myself wondering if this all happened because we needed a grandiose call to adventure. Every hero has one. You've had many in this lifetime alone, some of which you've probably answered. This time it's different. I can't help but feel like this time it affects us all.
How will we know when we've moved toward harmony? I'm not sure yet, because it doesn't seem to be human nature to move this way even within the self. So this is where we begin: because in the self is the only place your radical awareness can shift the planet. If nothing else, you can resolve the parts of you that are not in harmony -- and won't that feel more whole? Imagine 7 billion people who feel whole.
- My Invocation to be the light -
(Repeat to yourself out loud or write it in your journal)
That which I hate in you, I hate in me.
That which I love in you, I love in me.
I choose to love what I hate.
I choose to be what I love.
I choose to close the gap between "you" and "me" because the gap is in my mind.
When you fall, I fall.
When I fall, you fall.
We forgive one another.
Only through acceptance can we find the middle.
I choose to practice this love with my words, my thoughts, my intentions, and my actions all the days of my life.
And so it is.
This is me and my dad. I am three and I am helping him paint what would become library bookshelves for our house. I use the term "help" loosely, as I have a bucket of water and a paint brush, but I am sure I added a little flair to those shelves.
My dad's book collection would grow to thousands of books by the time they sold the house 20 years later. These shelves covered every wall of one room, literally floor to ceiling. This may have something to do with my book obsession. (Note the obvious sarcasm.)
We lovingly referred to the room with the books as the library as though we were 19th-century aristocrats. This was also where I spent almost every night discussing life with my dad. These discussions continue to this day, but now we text. Because it's 2017.
I grew up in a family where inquiry was just as important as introspection. If you were going to ask a question, you better be prepared to also seek the answer. This may also have something to do with why I entered a field where I ask questions for a living.
I love a good question. The entire basis of a good coach is a good question. Really. That's all we're made up of: questions. (And coffee. Lots of coffee.) We don't actually have the answers to the things we ask. (Sorry.) But that doesn't mean these questions shouldn't be asked.
A great question can be a guiding light. It can be the thing that transforms you. It can open new doors and close old ones. A good question can inspire action and motivate you for many years. But too many questions can make your head spin.
A question I have been asking my dad for the past three years was, "What is the meaning of life?" You know, nice and light. Until five days ago when he mic dropped this statement --
"Don't look for the answer, create it."
"What? Wait...what do you mean, CREATE it?" I stuttered over this revelation. He replied, "Life isn't about seeking so much as it's about creating. You can't take your questions to some all-knowing source. YOU are the source."
So there it is. Thousands of books, thousands of hours talking, one BIG question, and the answer was hiding in plain sight all along. They like to do that.
Which, of course, opened a floodgate of more questions. I can't help myself. Questions like:
How do I know I am valuable?
What is a calling, really?
How do I know I am on purpose?
Am I really helping?
What is the meaning of my work?
If there's no one to tell me I am on the right course, how do I totally trust myself?
And still, the answer was all the same.
The glaringly obvious answer to the most asked question was there all along. So, of course, I feel a bit righteous for even thinking this is THE answer. But it's a pretty good one. Just think how liberating this is!
If you could create the answer to every question you're asking about your life right now, you could put down the seeking and just look in the mirror and see what's there.
Who do you want to be?
What do you want to experience?
Where do you want to go?
What do you want to have?
How do you want to feel?
What kind of success do I want?
Why do I want to live?
What is joy? What is happiness? What purpose does my pain serve?
More questions, I know. However, if you are the source of the question AND the answer, then you get to actually create a life YOU want to live. Because the truth is, no one can even pretend to answer these for you. Others can live their lives and you can see examples of possibility through them. But it doesn't make it true for you. Truth is relative to your own choices.
After this conversation with my dad I experienced a really rich meditation and the symbol of a key came to me. Afterward, I wrote this in my journal, and I want to leave this with you as a kickoff to 2017:
"I want every human being, who is willing and aware, to discover their own key. To discover that they are their own key and they already have wholeness locked inside of them. The path of having access to their wholeness is personal and our only life purpose. So go now and create yourself with abandon and you won't just discover your key, you'll discover how to unlock your life."
Happy New Year!
My business coach recently shared this short video with me. The film recounts a Superbowl halftime show when Prince was the main act. And it was raining. Like, pouring buckets. Panicked about the rain and all of the show components -- you know, like electricity -- they called down to Prince's dressing room to check in about going on or not. And his response was this:
Can you make it rain harder?
And he nailed this performance. You can see it in the link above.
Can you make it rain harder? This, dear beacon, is now our calling. Why else does a beacon exist but to guide in the dark? We are built for darkness, did you know this? And the darker it is the more you shine. So, make it rain harder.
Sure, it would be a heck of a lot more convenient if we weren't needed so much, because that would mean we lived in a time when we weren't afraid, when things were a bit more predictable, when you could turn on the news and not see death, war, fear, economic crashes, aliens, etc. (I am just guessing because I don't actually watch the news. I don't need to eye the dark to know it's there -- I can feel it. Can't you?)
A few signs you are a beacon:
You are sensitive. Like super sensitive. Not just emotionally but even physically. You probably struggle, or have struggled before, with ailments like chronic pain, stomach issues, headaches, etc. And when you are in large crowds you secretly want to crawl into a hole. And maybe binge watch Gilmore Girls. (Just an example.)
You feel called to something, even if you can't quite put your finger on it. You feel called to go within, to ask big questions, to ponder words like fulfillment, purpose, and worth. You don't just want to answer this call, but you want to help people because of this call.
You have an adverse relationship to money. You want to feel free of the burden to have money and you simultaneously understand the ease money can bring -- but this also causes conflict because you feel like money is short-sighted. You feel like it muddies the water. You fear if you mixed money with your gifts that the sky would fall. (Or something equally as absurd)
You feel slightly crazy. You see signs everywhere and although you keep most of them to yourself, they make you feel so normal and also slightly crazy. Synchronicities happen more frequently, which also make you feel normal and also slightly crazy.
You, despite the times, feel a deep sense of hope and possibility. The sky could be falling and you'd still say, "What a beautiful time to start anew!" This can leave you feeling a bit naive, like you are missing something. But you also feel a connection to hope, as though hope is not only available, it's the perfect time to employ the magic hope can create.
You woke up on November 9th, 2016 and felt equal parts sad and determined. Change is inevitable and not all change makes sense in the moment. But despite this looming change, you woke up on November 9th more determined than ever. Like you not only matter, but you can't keep yourself small any longer.
If you checked off any of these boxes, then congratulations, you're a beacon! Sorry, there's no medal or award for this. It is actually a bit of a burden even in the blessing of being a beacon. The burden? A looming sense that you have to do something with this newfound power, and fast. The blessing?
You are a light. And the lights just went out, my friend.
Next week is #bethebeacon week! To join just sign up for my Inner Circle above and you're in. Then simply open the emails and I hope you'll join your fellow beacons on the free "Be the Beacon" call on December 9th.
Light and love,
I retired on October 22, 2016. I am 32.
I am not super wealthy or exhausted. I am not bored and I still have plenty to give.
But on this particular Saturday, I had the sudden realization that to do my best work, to play, to give and to truly let go of attachment and help others soar I needed to first retire. So I simply made the choice and now my real work can begin.
I was immediately overcome with freedom - no more "have-to's" or "must's". No more chasing business or desperate attempts at being the next "it girl coach". I've retired and have found myself in a deep practice of profound play.
Play is not sitting on the beach or skiing on the weekend. It's dancing with the divine and perfectly orchestrated universe. It's listening to sacred silence and hearing the sound of joy everywhere. It's giving my absolute best and most tapped in self without any limited attachment to outcome. It's choosing complete flow. And it's choosing to serve from a place of complete expression.
No more ladders to climb or popular industry clubs to kiss up to. I've retired. Now my only "job" is to listen to what wants to be created and fall in love with it and give myself totally to that vision. I now co-decide what and when. No more vacations and no more work days. In Divine play, it's all the same. I'm totally free and completely full.
Now before you get confused, I am not done "working." But I am done pushing. If you didn't need the money, need that client, need that person, need...need...need how would and could you approach life differently? Playfully? Freely? Fully? Intuitively?
Life is 100% what you make it be. We live in a culture designed around total comfort. Survival is not really the name of the game anymore. Neither is information or industry. We are living in an unprecedented time where the sole/soul purpose of your wild and precious life is to come home to your True Nature.
To heed your call is your only "job". And you can't do this on Facebook, you won't find it in your Twitter feed, or even on Instagram. You can't "like" your calling or take out an ad for it. You won't find it at that women's networking event or even on stage at the next Tedtalk.
For a moment there I thought I needed to play the game. To work hard. To build more strategy into my work or start FB ads again. Until I went within to a place I have not visited before and FELT so clearly what a huge mistake this would all be! I am not playing this game, it is rigged to keep your head down and your heart closed.
So I retired. And now I am FREE to BE the work. This month we dive into what this means, how you can practice your own version of retirement, and why this is the most exciting time to be alive.
Light and love,
Want weekly articles and journal prompts in your email? Join my Inncer Circle below!
You guys, I am so excited to announce my newest online space - the Soul Seeker Inner Circle! I used to stress out so much about my emails. What should I write? How many people will actually read it and how many will leave? Is this even helpful? And still, week after week I am so drawn to write. I love it. But I wasn't in love with my writing space. So...I changed it. (You're allowed to do that) I wanted to LOVE opening my email campaigns, love working on them, and pour more intention into what I created for my readers. I sent out a survey and the results really did surprise me. You want more self-development and purpose. You want more articles and more resources. Well, I can do that.
I created the Soul Seeker Inner Circle.A place for guidance, support, insight, community, and a behind-the-scenes of my own process. You will get more about voice, playing big, the fear gremlins, success, fulfillment, connection, and purpose.
Every month I'll send my best ideas, insights, and support to your inbox to help you live on purpose, create fulfillment,and a life that matters. Join your community (it’s free!) and welcome to the life of a soul seeker.
EACH MONTH YOU’LL GET:
- Articles I pour my heart and truth into – I write about purpose, answering your calling, money, connection, using your voice, being a leader, and help you to do the inner work.
- Journal prompts and workbooks – I love journal writing! It is a very dear practice of mine. Every week you’ll get a journal prompt and sometimes I’ll send you a digital journal workbook to help you dive into your process even more.
- Quotes I’m gushing over – Quotes are the best. They so quickly get to the heart of the matter. I will share my favorites every week to help inspire you and get you asking better questions of your life and purpose.
- Purple Room Book Club – I am a book lover and each month I’ll share my 2-3 favorites I am currently indulging in.
- Inner Circle Exclusive Offers – Be the first to know about Awaken Your Practice and exclusive virtual events and coaching calls.
- Fun Giveaways – Journals, books, workbooks, I have plenty to share!
This is probably the easiest article I have ever written because I am SO grateful for what just unfolded last weekend. I witnessed people finally put on paper what they WANT, that BIG vision that almost feels too big to be true and then spend three days getting into alignment so they can make it happen. When I first started to write the book for
I thought I was just outlining some ideas to compliment the teachings. Six months later and a book that is 248 pages in my hands I can say this is not just an outline of ideas - somewhere along the way I poured my
into this book and program. I finally acknowledged that I know some things and have some strong beliefs about this thing we call self-development and the powerful tool called coaching.
Yes, this weekend was designed for entrepreneurs and change leaders who are building purposeful lives from their heart center. For people who's purpose IS their vocation. But the ENTIRE focus is on YOU. Your essence, your being, what makes you, you. Of the 248 pages, less than 5 pages are about "business", "marketing", and "sales."
Because what you do is not nearly as important as WHO you are. And now that this weekend is complete I know I made the right choice to keep the focus where I did. I am still processing this whole experience but I want to share a few of my biggest takeaways from the weekend.
You're human No matter if you want to launch a business, start a non-profit, create a foundation, be the next Gabby Bernstein or Oprah, or change the entire money system you are human, first. You are susceptible to things like fear, judgment, uncertainty, stories, habits, patterns, and you have a history. Give space to your humanity because you have to go through your humanness to launch your big beautiful purpose.
Asking "how" will stop you before you start Too often the complexity of our big idea is too much to wrap our minds around. We don't know how we're going to possibly get our idea off the ground because we don't dream in small, baby dreams we dream in BIG LIFE ALTERING dreams. But even these have the first step. Find your first step or asking, "how?" will keep you from even getting started.
Money is involved Money is a game. It can also be a game changer. Whether you agree with the system of money or how it plays out in our world today, if you have it, spend it, hoard it, save it or give it away you are part of the game. Find a way to be congruent in this game and to play it in a way that empowers you and the people you serve.
You deserve to see what you're capable of You were not simply placed on this planet to breathe. You are conscious and you know you exist. You can think about life and live it at the same time. This is called self-awareness. We are in a changing time. Because of technology, industry is not what it used to be and I believe that conscious commerce is the new social change agency of tomorrow. It's the business builders and leaders who turn problems into profitable solutions that can dramatically alter our world for the better. But this means your ideas have to come out of your head and heart and into the world!
Mostly what I take away from the weekend is that people are amazing. Our ability to connect and share is so awesome. To sit in a room with change leaders for three days and see them go to their core and clear their stories and fears in the name of more service and more possibility doesn't give me hope, it IS hope in action.
I am already getting requests for the next one (thank you!). Early Bird enrollment opens Monday (I am opening 5 early spots at $797) and the next AYP is March 24-26, 2017. We're just getting started :)
Light and love,
Today I am giving myself permission to take a much-needed breath.
I am taking a pause and some space to reflect and get ready for the weekend ahead. To put the things we create into the world is fun, scary, exciting, and full of unexpected twists and turns. No matter how organized, prepared or ready you think you are there's intention and
then there's life.
Today I need to make some space for life.
In less than four days I have people from all over coming to
This thing that for whatever reason had to be born through me. And I am so grateful it did. Because, as much as I am its creator I am also its student.
In the last two weeks, I've been meeting with my guest teachers, finalizing the teaching schedule, ordering supplies, renting chairs, ordering coffee, stocking up on markers, printing forms, and putting some love into a few surprises for the students. This is the last push but the one thing I haven't done is b r e a t h e.
Because taking a breath isn't encouraged, is it? Hustle. Push. Drive. Create. Sell. Do. These things are encouraged. I get it, it's the actions you take that get you from where you are to where you want to go. Dreams require movement.
Movement without being centered is called burn out.
Movement from your center is called passion.
Awaken Your Practice is certainly a passion project. And the people coming this weekend are working in their passion projects or at least they desire to be.
The AYP book opens with a return to your center and ends with a call to surrender and let go. Today I surrender. I am so proud of this teaching and the people who felt called to attend it. I have done everything I need to do. I've written, connected, shared, and created the space. And now all I have to do is show up and share.
Believe it or not, the actual teaching is the easy part.
We all know how to BE the thing we're called to. We know how to create, write, photograph, build, coach, design, stretch, and share. It's letting ourselves play big, ask people to show up, have the courage to say what we're brilliant at and dare to be seen that is the real work.
It's our contribution that defines us. When you answer your calling this is what you're really doing. Contributing.
"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." -Margaret Mead
So here's to what calls you and whispers from your heart in the middle of the night. Here's to the silent knowing that tugs at you. And to you answering it for the world to bask in.
Now I am off to walk among the trees and take the most sensational breath.
Light and love, Andrea
These are a few behind-the-scenes from an early
sunrise shoot at Devil's Lake last weekend. Driving up Cascade Lakes Hwy with the orange sun just illuminating Mt. Bachelor, as the fog rolled over the lakes, is a sight I will never forget. There is something magical about dawn and the waking of a new day. I am hitting pause today to reflect and express some much-needed gratitude. As I round the corner and count down the final 11 days until
I need to take a deep breath. I have been traveling, adventuring, writing, and preparing for this weekend since March and as it comes near I'm really just in awe.
Gratitude. The remarkable practice of recognizing the good. Something we can all do more of, don't you think?
Just two weeks ago I was on a private vision immersion with a client and watched gratitude melt fear before my very eyes.
I felt gratitude for nature that can take my breath away looking out over Sparks lake as the sun set.
And I feel gratitude (beyond measure) for my Awaken weekend just days away and everyone who has supported me in making this possible.
After we wrapped the photo shoot we warmed up over chai and the best hot breakfast I've had in a long time. My dear friend and photographer, Jennifer Alyse, looked at me and asked, "how do you stay grounded?" To which I replied, without even thinking about it, "I just am."
Is that true? Where did that answer come from?!
But this is one of the ways when I am in the midst of coaching, teaching, writing, travel, speaking, and creating that I keep my feet on the ground. I say thank you. For all of it. Yes, ALL of it. Even the things that push me and challenge me (which is a kind way of saying the things that light my sh*t up). Because I am also human and not exempt from struggling.
My goal isn't to not suffer but rather to understand my suffering and be ok with it. One of the ways I do this is through gratitude. And I invite you to practice some today. Call it thankfulness, gratitude, acknowledgment, appreciation, recognition, or many of the other synonyms it doesn't matter what you call it. What does matter (and I mean literally manifests) is born from what you SAY matters.
Here is a quick, unedited list of things I am grateful for in this very moment. I hope you make your own list and then bask in the energy of that gratitude.
People My work Fall Hot coffee Blank journals Family Our puppy Yummy tea Mountains Birdsong Creativity The ability to read Books Home cooked meals Taking a deep breath Working for myself This space here YOU Water Funny movies Money My health A good bottle of wine
Deep chats with my Dad
My mom's health
Art Post-it notes (What would I do without a list?!)
Cards on my wall
Trees Travel Friends The ocean Hiking Meditation My coaches Lavender Red maples in the fall Fog in the morning Walks
and my beautiful, strong, inspired, supportive, powerful, loving wife.
I could keep going. This is the joy of gratitude, it has this kind of compound effect. Try it!
In light and love,
"I am in my own right. I am in my own authority. I am in my perfect divine timing. I am growing and attracting. I am reaching and rooting. I am everything I've asked for. I am clear and focused. I am ready now. And so it is."
I don't remember what inspired me to write these statements or what I was reflecting on when I did but I come back to this because success is born from your beliefs and how much permission you give yourself.
Not enough of us grant ourselves permission to radically succeed. To me, radical success means wealth, ease, reach, service, clarity, peace of mind, and vision.
Earning 6-figures is a result. It's feedback that says, "Hey, you did something that added up to this number." All results are feedback. There are some undeniable themes that led me to 6-figures but of them all there is one I borderline obsess about every day - a relationship with the not knowable, the universe, divine source, or the energy between energy.
Ok -- let me back up to August 2014. I had just left the business I found with my wife and dared to imagine I could embark on a totally new adventure all my own. And I was terrified. I had failed 8 other businesses at this point. Why would this be any different? I had to start this business with $0. And it had to make money or break even. This was the deal I made with myself.
I produced some pretty bad ideas in the beginning. And thank goodness I did because they taught me the most.
--->I learned that selling digital products to a massive market required a ton of energy and money to get in front of people. So this was out.
---> I learned that my list didn't love to buy from me. So creating sales funnels was also a waste of time and energy.
---> I learned that when I got in front of people (speaking, coffee, connection) magic would happen in my business. But I didn't make this connect for almost a year.
---> I learned that if I was working M-F and charging $75 for an individual coaching session I was not even making minimum wage. I made $4,000 my first year in business and $35k the next year before taxes.
---> I learned that I needed to change my approach to this work.
One year ago I stopped looking outside of myself for answers and I stopped listening to "marketing experts", "Facebook gurus", and "High-end coaches" and got very still. I listened to my heart by opening up a dialogue through my journal. Call it a portal, call it a channel, call it woo-woo, I don't care. It didn't bring life to my business - It brought my business TO life.
Privately I was practicing these incredible things like breath work, listening to my intuition, meditation, prayer, paying attention to synchronicity, communion with the unknown, listening to nature, and channeling my guides.
But when it came to my business - it was like I slammed the door and forgot everything I knew. I didn't trust my gut. I didn't ask for support. I looked completely outside myself for my business to succeed and I was failing, quick.
I felt like I was running out of time. Now, in perspective, one year to a profitable business is almost unheard of. I know this. But I made a deal with myself; this business was not to cost me or my partnership anything. And we were bordering on this deadline. I gave myself until the end of 2015 to bring home a paycheck or I was going job hunting.
I threw caution to the wind (it's a real thing) and hired a coach I couldn't afford AND asked him to charge me more money to hold me accountable to a BIG vision. And because I was now borrowing money to keep my business open I stopped paying for all marketing and did something no one was telling me to do - I brought massive amounts of faith and trust into what would unfold next. I surrendered.
And then magic happened. Things that shouldn't be possible, happened.
I got hired to speak.
I intuited an article called, "Roots to Fruits" and filled my consults 3 months out.
I would fill my coaching program in less than 3 months.
I was a keynote for a beautiful event for women.
I started to hear some version of this over and over - "I have no idea how you ended up in my inbox/email/mail because I am not on your list but it feels like divine timing."
And the more I trusted and leaned into this faith the more people would show up.
Is this "woo-woo"? No.
We know that the act of how we observe something changes what we observe. Because light, thought, emotion and consciousness are things and they move, act, and honor our intentions we can predict our outcomes by observing our present thoughts, emotions, and expectations. (Translation: what you DECIDE will be and dedicate to both consciously and unconsciously, will be.)
Was I granted success for doing good in the world? No. Absolutely not.
It doesn't work like that. There is no reward because this would assume some moral or ethical righteousness that is better than another. Meaning - who gets to judge what is good and what is bad?
I practice and employ universal laws consistently and have faith that they've already succeeded. And then I act as though I've already succeeded and what I need TO succeed shows up.
Which laws? I thought you'd never ask! (This is my interpretation of each law. There are many out there. Adopt what feels right for you.)
The Law of Reciprocity
What you give you receive. Want to receive more? Give a million times more.
The Law of Divine Compensation
You will be rewarded most when you heed the call of your heart and answer your calling. To earn money from something that feels degrading to your soul, will be.
The Law of Light and Shadow
The world is your mirror. There is nothing in your field of awareness that is not also inside of you. Lean into your fears for they are your gateway to freedom.
The Law of Intention
What you intend and commit to both consciously, unconsciously and in your highest plane of existence will be. But you have to be patient. For the time is not instantaneous even if thought is.
The Law of Dharma
You have a calling. You have a pilgrimage of the soul. It's in your bones. And when it knocks on your door, answer.
When I paired this practice with everything I've dedicated my time to (see last week's article) it adds up to what I would call success. Financially, yes. But also joyfully. I am very happy to be living in a way that shines more light on my path, my calling, and my purpose.
No money can quantify the power of fulfillment.
I want this for you. If you want this too,
Awaken Your Practice is just around the corner. Just sayin ;)
In light and love,
Some of you will read this and LOVE what I have to say. Some will never come back because of the title alone.
This is dedicated to those who stay.
Read. Learn. And take these lessons to your business or your life and do whatever it takes to integrate the ones that feel right for you. I am a spiritual coach who works with business owners, entrepreneurs, innovators and thought leaders. I teach radical success through a spiritual lens. Spiritual is, for me, connecting to my higher purpose, understanding the bigger picture, doing the inner work, and seeing things in their right place.
I don't focus on results because they are results. There is a chain of events that lead to results. I believe if you go to the source of success you get the result you want every time. This is why I don't do strategy. It doesn't work if it's where you begin. And I begin with who you ARE. Your BEing. Your beliefs and your soul.
This is how I got to 6-figures. I will do my best to outline as much as I can below. I will leave things out. Not on purpose but because when you show up every day and work on your success you forget everything you've done. These are what stick out most to me.
In total transparency - this is not a lead into a program or a sales funnel. I just want you to have this information. Eleven years ago when I started my first business I would have given anything to be taught these principles.
In 2014 I made $4,000 in my business. In 2015 I made $35,000. In 2016 I made $175,000. In 2017 I will make $240,000. In 2018 I am projecting $500,000. ---> How did this happen?
There are SO many coaches out there teaching 6-figure systems. I know some of them personally. There are a bazillion e-books, blog posts, seminars, podcasts, coaching programs, etc. teaching you HOW to make 6-figures. You can't pay me to help you make 6-figures because it's short sighted.
Ok -- here we go.
How I got here. These are in no particular order. And there's more where these came from. But these are ALL things I had to work very intently to be OK doing on a daily basis.
It didn't take me one year to go from $35k to $175k - it took me SIX years.
Yes, there's technically only one year between 2015 and 2016 but it required everything I did in the past 6 years to make this leap possible.
I mastered my craft. While people were studying SEO, social media tactics, sales funnels, etc. I had my nose in the "coaching/neuroscience/psychology/business/money/spirituality books, seminars, certifications, programs, and mentorships. I mastered what it means to be a great coach.
I hired a coach and stretched what I thought I could "afford". I paid a coach $1,500/month for a year before I charged $1,500/month for a year. I took the risk, first.
I learned everything I could about money.
All of it. I mean
all of it.
And that awesome Tony Robbin's book about Money that weighs 10lbs. and is 700 pages? Read it. LOVED it. I took money seminars, went to money classes, read 50+ money books, and dealt with allllllll my money baggage. And I do mean all.
I treat my business like a business. I have a biz bank account, a biz license, disability insurance, and pay myself actual paychecks.
I set goals beyond what I thought was possible. I didn't set out to be a 6-fgure coach, I set out to be a 7-fgure company.
I quit paying for marketing and advertising. I started to MEET people. Like, talk to real people. I had over 90 in-person conversations in 90 days last year.
I had a TON of coaching conversations. Instead of being busy trying to FB market sales funnels for an email I actively booked coaching conversations. Over 1,000 of them.
I wasn't afraid to give my absolute best service away, for free. Of those 1,000 coaching convos I had 180 this year alone, and they were 2-hours each. These calls changed my life and my business.
I modeled successful people. If they wore a watch, so did I. If they read so-and-so book, so did I. If they meditated, so did I. If they drank kale smoothies in the morning, I tried. ;)
I grew my team. I stopped DIYing everything.
I tapped into a mission I can't possibly accomplish and it will drive me for life.
I fell in love with this awesome and very handy resource called money.
I put blinders up to "competition".
I invested more than $30,000 in continued education.
I practiced hearing the word no by getting over 150 of them this year alone.
I asked for criticism and honest feedback.
I did a s*#t ton of inner work.
I quit quitting when it got hard.
I gave away more than I expected to be paid for.
I read over 200 books.
I took total responsibility for my lack of success in the past.
I started a morning routine that I am dedicated to no matter the day of the week.
I cleaned up my diet. And I healed my body.
I worked less but did more that mattered.
I cut out more than 25 hours of TV per week.
I only started enrolling 10/10 clients and risked leaving money on the table.
I filled my office with affirming messages.
I cleared out toxic relationships.
I created a compelling future I can't stop thinking about.
I realized I LOVE people.
I created a life philosophy.
Of the people I meet, have a drink with, or meet for coffee every week I make sure the majority are smarter, wealthier, and more successful than me.
I deleted social media and email from my phone and check FB 5 minutes per week.
I keep examining my life - my dreams, my fears, my triggers, what I am grateful for, what I want, who I want to be, and what I want to create. Without this, none of the above is possible.
I should be exhausted just reading this list but this is the true cost of a 6-figure business. You can't just sponsor a post and count your followers. I had to actively cultivate a business that was worth investing IN.
I am not exhausted. I am happy. Beyond measure. Not because of the money. I am grateful for the money. I am happy with the service I get to give because I don't have to worry about money.
In light and love,
"I am not your guru" is the title of a documentary circling Netflix right now. It is a behind-the-scenes film of an Anthony Robbins event called Date with Destiny. You can Google it or search Netflix and if you haven't already seen the film I urge you to. There's some controversy over his teaching methods. Is it just shock and awe? Is his power what creates change and are people just submitting without integrating the work? You will have to decide for yourself.
Here's why I am spending this space to write about this - because I can't stop thinking about this movie. Because I have watched it 3 times. Because I am one of the few who TOTALLY agree with what happens here. And I realize this puts me a bit on the fringe...so obviously I had to write about it. :)
Tony Robbins uses NLP. NLP is a method that uses language to interrupt patterns we have embedded in our subconscious. Language is very powerful. Words and labels are how we story information or memories about what happens to us. Those stories become our filters. Those filters tell us what to tune into and what not to. This is how we can stay stuck in the same pattern (like no money, fear of failure, poor relationships, etc.) ongoing for years.
NLP is just a tool. Really, he uses love and his commitment to his mission to help end or alter the path suffering has put someone one. And he will stop at nothing to see this mission through.
Two things fascinated me about this event and the film:
ONE - We are so numb, stuck, apathetic, and lost that 2,500 people spend $5,000 every year to sit in a room for 72 hours to WAKE UP.
TWO - Our typical model for change isn't working. According to Dr. Brene Brown, we are the most "overweight, over-medicated, in debt adult cohort in U.S. history." --> Ok. This flat out pisses me off.
We have the most resources, money in circulation, and awareness today about how to effectively change our lives and still we aren't doing the work. Why?
Why are so many people sleep walking?
Why are we treating depression and trauma as illnesses?
Why are we medicating our problems which are the greatest gifts we have?
Why are we so angry, lost, confused, apathetic, and anxious?
As Tony Robbins says in the film, "We think low-level problems are THE problem because we don't want to deal with the root of our suffering."
So I come away from watching this movie (three times) and what is one to do? Well, sit down and have an entire conversation over breakfast with my wife about change and the art of transformation, obviously. (These are the moments I KNOW I married the right person, thanks babe for getting me.) #wearenerds
The question I asked her was this - What compels one person to shift on a dime and another to die with resentment in their bones?
You know. Small question. And the conversation that unfolded blew me away. I took notes and want to share them here. I don't have THE answer. I can't. It's all part of the human experience. But this I DO know - we are out of time. If we don't start LOVING one another and our home planet....well, I think you can fill in the blank.
So here you have it. Unfiltered notes on the art of transformation...
The difference between interest in change and commitment is taking 100% responsibility for your life. And the decision to do so happens in an instant. Yes, even the things that happen TO you. Can you be a victim? Yes, of course. But when you HOLD ON to your experience you are self-victimizing.
The more willing you are to go into the darkness the more light you let in.
Suffering is human. You will never not suffer. Suffering isn't the problem. Unintegrated and rejected suffering is the problem. And as Tony Robbins says, "Your problem is you think you shouldn't have problems."
You can't have a breakthrough without being triggered. Your "trigger" is the moment your fear comes true. THIS is prime time for a breakthrough.
A breakthrough requires a pattern interrupt. Change requires a commitment to cultivating the new pattern.
We are collectively numb. Don't look to the status quo to teach you about the possibility. They can't.
You have to be hungry to make this change. You have to find what is BIGGER than you.
I want to help everyone, I really do. And I can't. I won't. Not just because of the sheer amount of people on the planet but because not everyone is here to change.
You can't let go of your fears. You have to integrate them.
Problems sculpt our soul. You "problems" are your best teacher. As long as you aren't learning you have a problem.
Events are irrelevant. It's what you DO with that event that matters. And I mean literally, events can create the matter of your life.
YOU are your own guru. YOU are your own change agent. I am a guide. I facilitate an environment where change is possible but I can't change you for you.
Here is what I decided in an instant: I am done muting my beliefs about this work. Because, as I said, we are out of time.
I am not a practitioner. I am not a therapist. I am not a strategist. I am not just a coach. I am a change agent who BELIEVES in her soul that transformation, joy, love, and happiness is your God given right. Period.
And this is what I believe...
This is NOT Strategy and planning
This is not something you can think your way through. Your stories are not calculated, they are created from the need for love and safety. And when they stop serving you and you decide to face them or untangle them it’s the time to come out of your head and into your heart. We go in with radical acceptance and self-discovery. You will take action, but first, you have to meet you where you are.
This is NOT Just coaching
Coaching is a powerful tool and one that I love. Coaching is a way of showing up with someone and using powerful, open-ended questions to inspire new action in them. I use a coaching container but I fully understand that I can’t help you move forward and get you where you want to go without giving space to where you come from, first.
This is NOT Just therapy
I am not a diagnostician because you are not sick or broken. Therapy is an intimate experience of uncovering and healing. I use therapeutic energy to create safety so you can open up and reveal to yourself the shadows that plague your life. But I fully understand that sitting or stewing in your trauma doesn’t release it or integrate it. Your stories need to see the light of day and be heard. They have so much to teach you and we’ll use them to help return you to a state of wholeness.
THIS WORK IS...
An exploration of YOU
This may be the first time in your life you really meet yourself. This may be the first time you connect the dots or see your stories as energy meant to heal, teach, and guide you and not something designed to trap, harm, or keep you stuck. All humans struggle and hold on to their stories unnecessarily. How freeing will it feel when your stories and limiting beliefs are no longer gripping you or when you are not longer gripping them?
Healing occurs when you create a new relationship to the things that happened to you and when you let yourself learn from them without harming yourself or shaming you for them any longer.
Unearthing why you’re here
It’s our soul’s purpose to become complete and we incarnate to learn what we need to create wholeness. Your calling is your gateway to doing this. Your purpose will ignite a kind of passion that is immeasurable and will bring your entire life into immediate alignment and understanding.
Suddenly the things you thought happened to you really happened for you and you are left with a profound amount of self-love and self-acceptance. For most, once integrated, this calling will lead you to teach, give, and serve others in some way.
You cannot get someplace new until you create new, inspired action – action born out of your most authentic self. Movement is what creates the tangible results in your life. But I want you making the right movements inspired by your aligned self. Most of my clients come to me because they want something like money, health, purposeful work, to feel seen, success, etc. They also want joy, excitement, confidence, inspiration, and clarity. These experiences are inevitable with the right action. The things you want are not actually outside of yourself. They are an extension of your beliefs and how you see and experience the world.
Self-love, self-acceptance, and self-worth
All of life is an extension of how you see yourself and how you show up in the world. Imagine what is possible when everywhere you go all you see are more ways to LOVE and accept yourself?
Breakthroughs and NEW roots
Your entire life and the results you’re here to create are grown from your roots. Your beliefs, desires, choices, stories, attachments, and habits are your roots. The results you want to accomplish are your fruits. We focus on planting new roots so you can grow new fruits. This isn’t about doing more but being the person you need to be to accomplish the goal’s you have.
Growth and Confidence
Both within who you are and the things you’re dedicated to is a desire to grow and expand. There is no one plan because everyone’s purpose is a path only they can walk. This is a kind if growth that brings new business, perfect clients, purposeful work, and new opportunities effortlessly to your doorstep. My role in this is to help you recognize it and help you say yes to everything you’ve ever wanted and asked for.
What will you decide in an instant?
In light and love,
I love a birthday. They are a gift in themselves. Because YOU are a gift. To even be here is a gift. But it doesn't mean it's always easy. In fact, I hope it isn't because it's those moments that push against our life where we learn the most. This has been an incredible year. It was just two years ago that I was in the throws of a total life collapse. Nothing added up anymore and I was very lost. So to be here today on the other side of that experience and to feel as grateful and full as I do...in a way feels like a miracle and in a way just feels like life.
This is how it goes - we live, learn, live, learn, etc. Some lessons suck. There's no polite way to say that. Some learnings are brutal and make you question everything. Some are mildly uncomfortable. And others barely flag your life but they are all just as important.Growth happens in the contrast of discomfort and comfort.
We learn about love when we hurt. We learn about life when we're lost. We learn about happiness when we're sad. We learn about success when we're failing. We learn about what we want when riddled with things we don't want.
I believe this so much that I have made my work and my life a dedication to teaching this. And I am no exception! I am human. Isn't it a wondrous thing?!
To celebrate my humanity I want to gift myself space to reflect on a few things I really took to heart this year. It was a year of radical growth for me. Radical as in rooted and anchored. Growth as in painful and awesome, all at the same time. If you get something from these, great! If not. Well, it's my birthday and sometimes you just have to be self-serving. ;) #kiddingnotkidding
I learned that no one can show up until I do. If life is my mirror then no one can show up until I show up. This is true in my work, friendships, family, community, and partnership. If I long for something then it is the very thing I have to give. If I need for something it is the very thing I need to give myself. Last November I came out as a spiritual leader. It wasn't as painful as I anticipated and it still challenges the part of me that is terrified of being invisible. I learned that if I really want to be seen in this way I have to BE this way.
I learned it isn't about me. When people reject my ideas, it isn't about me. When I serve my clients, it isn't about me. And when I speak to the truth I experience in my own heart and life it isn't about me. I feel that the work I am doing is my calling and my purpose for being on earth. And it is so much bigger than me even when it affects me.
I learned that I want things. I want the world to change. I want less violence. I want cancer to go away. I want a big house. I want to live in the mountains. I want my family to be healthy. I want to live a long life with my wife. I want to publish a book. I want to be a 7-figure coach. I want to put myself out there. I want people to stop judging and start loving. I want people to go within. I want to enjoy every aspect of life. I want to go Home. I want to not hide the things I want. We all want. It feels good! It's about dreaming and visioning new life. And it's about honoring and loving right where you are.
I learned that I have learned a lot. Yup. Not just this year but all the years of my life are so packed with lessons it's incredible. Life really is handed to you on a silver platter and the moment you see this, you are free.
I learned that I am fiercely loved and appreciated. THANK YOU.
I learned that I really love life. Like a lot. I really do love life. I am in awe of life and it's magic. I used to live from beneath a dark cloud and I didn't see the purpose of life. You could have spelled out miracles for me and I would have said you were a liar. And today I see so much beauty, potential, joy, and possibility everywhere I turn. I wouldn't change where I've been or what I've experienced.
I wish for all people to have their entire life be their entire awakening. To get out of their own way and go for it. To answer their calling and turn their art into their purpose and their gift back to the world. Maybe this is a selfish want. But it's my birthday and this is what I want.
Light and love, Andrea
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Something I loved writing for the Awaken your Practice workbook was these little notes from your higher self. I sprinkled them throughout the workbook. And they became the easiest and most fun parts to write. I am proud of the whole book but these little notes seem to come in at just the right time because they pack a BIG message. Today I offer a new one as a download from your higher self. Ok, my higher self but I have a feeling this something you also need to hear. (P.S. Sometimes my higher self uses some...assertive language. But she's smiling and coming from love. This I know for sure.) Enjoy!
What the *&#$ are you waiting for? No, really. What magic wand are you waiting to grant you this incredible thing you've already been given? We don't give inspiration to just anyone. We give specific inspiration to its perfect pairing, its perfect match, and it's perfect creator.
Can more than one of you build it? Of course. But if you possess the idea now I assure you there is a reason. Don't ask why. It's irrelevant.
You know when you see an idea out in the world and you think, "Hey! I thought of thatyears ago!" Well if you don't take the inspiration and build it we move it on to someone else. They didn't steal it. You dragged your feet. And quite honestly there is work to be done so we ask you to please stop dragging your feet.
Here's the thing, there's no one to give you the permission you seek. There's no one to invite you to the table of your purpose or of your life. There is no one to graduate you into the work you are destined for. And there is certainly no one to determine your value, worth, or ability to create said purpose. Except for one.
You're it. You're your permission grantor. You graduate you. And you invite yourself to the table of our purpose. And something else we should mention - the work can't begin until you show up. It doesn't happen on the sidelines. It happens in the arena.
The big, beautiful, and bold work you're here to offer the world and to the evolution of your soul can not happen on paper or in your head. It requires doing something.
It requires a commitment to see it through even when it changes your life in ways you don't want. Even when it pushes you right to your edge of fear and limiting beliefs. And especially when it makes you question how incredible you actually are and how bright you are allowed to shine. It is in these moments when the purpose can reveal its entirety to you.
You think it's about just giving something to the world? Sorry. This is not a one-way ticket. This is a give and receive path. Because the very thing you have to give is the very thing you are destined to learn.
So we ask you - what are you waiting for? Don't look to us. We're waiting on you. It's your move.
Light and love, Your highest self & Andrea