Life Coaching 101 - let me break it down for you
There is a stigma attached to life coaching - for example, is it New Age? Frivolous? Lacking in professionalism? Still, my favorite question is, "What is it a life coach does?" Now I may be a bit bias, but everyone needs a life coach. Everyone! And that is truly the reason for this article. "Ninety percent of all those who fail are not actually defeated. They simply quit." - Paul J. Meyer
As your life coach my job is not just to keep you from quitting, it's to get you moving forward again.
Before going any further I want to answer a few questions about life coaching because I know what you are really wondering…
Is this just a watered down version of therapy?
It’s not therapy or a version of therapy. We won’t look at causes of trauma in your life. We will look at your life from today forward. What do you dream about? What does your ideal life look like and feel like? How do you want to feel in your body everyday? These are some of the topics we look at and actualize in life coaching.
Am I going to be emotional?
Maybe. But that’s ok. Emotion is a powerful release. You might also get angry or want to laugh really loud. Emotion is great because that is the part of your brain where your stories live and in life coaching we are working with your old and new stories about yourself.
How will I know it is working?
You don’t know me yet but I am asking for you to trust me on this one – you will just know. You will leave our sessions feeling clear and it will seem like a physical weight has been lifted from your body. You will actually see and experience things differently. There will be less anxiety and more clarity. You will wake up and feel totally refreshed and revived.
Is it just a bunch of goal setting?
Goals are important but you don’t need me to help you set goals. You need me to help you actualize your goals. Have you set goals before? Of course you have! Some are even your BIG dreams. Now, how many of those BIG dream goals have come to life? This is where I come in. We will approach this one day at a time and you will step into the person it takes to accomplish your dreams.
However, not doing what you say you’re going to do has nothing to do with motivation. It is all about PREDICTION.
A lack of confidence comes from the inability to predict your future and belief that you don’t have control over what’s next. This is actually your mind and body under threat. Threat is a hardwired response designed to keep you safe. When under threat your body secretes high levels of cortisol and adrenaline into the blood to physically allow you the strength to get away from a threat as fast as possible.
BUT what if the threat is actually emotional – there is no “getting away” and the longer you linger in that state the longer your body is being pumped with hormones that over time create massive problems! Problems like pain, weight gain, mental cloudiness, and massive exhaustion.
Why is a life coach talking about threat? Because if you’re under threat you can not create change in your life. Together I can help minimize the experience of threat and help you recognize the signs so you can get going again!
I guarantee that you can have confidence in your life if you knew what was coming next. Now we can never really predict what’s coming next but we have a choice to choose how we respond to what’s next.
But first, are you willing to let go of all the reasons change hasn't worked in the past? Together I will help you tell the truth about yourself to yourself. Are you willing to have those hard conversations with yourself about what is really going on?
What is the missing link? Clarity. First we create clarity and then you can see exactly what is going on. However, to know is not enough. In order for your clarity to make a difference requires action.
You need an action plan in place to make sure you are going to DO what you say you’re going to do. Sometimes all that is missing is having someone on your side that will take you from where you are to where you want to be. Enter me, your life coach!
IF you want real results, long-term change, someone you can count on, and to quiet your inner critic (or as my friend Leanne calls them your inner bitches) for good then you will want to hire me. BUT, and this is really important, only under these conditions:
- You want to be held accountable
- You are ready to rewrite your story
- You WANT to move forward
- You are serious about loving YOU again
- You want real time results and are willing to do the work
I won't fluff it up for you - there isn't time for that! When I work with you it's because you desire change now. Not tomorrow or a few months from now. TODAY is where I work, in your present moment. That's all we really can guarantee so let's begin with that.
You don't need to wait months and months to create the habits and take the actions that will lend you different results. You don't have to be great at knowing how to move yourself forward, in fact if you did know you would have done so already. You don’t need more answers – you need better questions. And that is what I am going to gift you.
- What would you do if you knew you could not fail?
- What do you believe to be true about your body?
- Go into your future one year – how did you get there?
- What is the answer you most want to hear?
- If your inner wise self were here, what would she tell you?
There are thousands of powerful questions where these came from…I won’t give you advice because I know that you have plenty of people in your life today shelling out their advice to you. Although their intentions are good there is a Golden Rule that your friends and loved ones have forgotten. I bet you too have forgotten this powerful rule –
You are the ONLY expert in YOUR own life.
Powerful questions bring your expertise out to play! She is within you right now with a LOT of the answers you’ve been searching for. I call her your Inner Woman and it’s time you take a walk in her shoes.
If you keep doing what you're doing, you will keep getting what you're getting. Let someone else help move you forward so you don't have to do it again. Wouldn't that really be the best?!
In a nutshell, that's what we life coaches do :)